SELECTIONS FROM THE REVITALISATION OF THE SCIENCES OF RELIGION Al-Ghazali’s Ihya’ Ulum al-Din The Ethics of Companionship and Fellowship Chapter One On the Virtues of Companionship and Fellowship, its conditions, degrees, benefits On the Virtues of Companionship and Fellowship Know that companionship is the fruit of good manners, separation is the fruit of bad manners. So good manners yield cordiality and companionship and coexistence. But bad manners yield hatred, envy and discord. As much as the producer is praiseworthy the fruit will be likewise. The virtues of good manners are evident in religion, Allah, the Almighty praised His Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, for his good manners: “Surely, you (Prophet Muhammad) are of a great morality.” (Koran Ch. 68 verse 4) The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “The greatest aid in admittance to Paradise is to fear Allah and good manners.” The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “I was sent to fulfill the code of ethics.” Jesus said: “Make yourself likeable to Allah by your hatred for those who commit sins, and make yourself closer to Allah by distancing yourself from them, and seek the pleasure of Allah in your hatred of them.” They said: “O Jesus! Who should we sit with then?” He replied: “Sit with those who when you see them you remember Allah, and the one whose words increases your deeds, and whose deeds encourage you towards the End.” In the sayings of the Companions, Ali - may Allah be pleased with him - said: “Adhere to your fellows, surely they are help for your life and the Hereafter, do you hear the saying of the inhabitants of the Fire?” ‘We have no intercessors now, no caring friend.So we have no intercessors.” (Koran Ch. 26 verse 100-101) Abd Allah ibn Umar (may Allah be pleased with them) said: “If I had fasted the day and would not break it, if I stood all night in prayer without sleeping, and had spent all my money in the cause of Allah, I die the day I will die and there is love in my heart for the people who obey Allah, the Almighty, and I hate the people who disobey Allah, none of this would benefit me.” Umar - may Allah be pleased with him - said: “If any of you have gained some affection from his brother he should hold to it, it is very rare to gain something like this.” Al Fadil ibn Ayyad said: “The look of a man to the face of his brother with mercy and affection is worship.” An Exposition on the Description of the One to be Chosen for Fellowship Know that not every human is suitable for fellowship. The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “The person is on the religion of his friend, so you should choose carefully who you take as a friend.” A friend must have a distinguished nature and character for, which you desire his friendship. What is derived from friendship are religious and worldly benefits: as to the worldly benefits, it may be to benefit from his wealth or his influence, or just to have the benefit of his companionship and nearness. As for the religious benefit, there are various aspects, from these is the benefit of knowledge and deeds, also the use of influence to be protected from the harm of those who cast doubt in the hearts and hinder worship. And of these is the benefit of wealth to save the time spent in making a living, and to have assistance in times of hardship and difficulty, there is the benefit to be blessed by the prayers offered for your sake, as well as the expectation of intercession in the Hereafter, as some of the first Muslims have said: “Make more friends because for every believer there is an intercession, and you may be included in the intercession of your friend.” These are all benefits and each of them holds conditions, which are not gained except through them, as we explain. There are five conditions, which qualify the one who you choose as a friend: He must be sound of mind, of good manner, not wicked nor one who invents in the religion, nor should he be eager for the worldly life. Allah, the Almighty has said: “…nor obey he whose heart We have made neglectful of Our remembrance..” (Koran Ch.18 verse 29) Chapter Two The Due Rights of Brotherhood and Companionship The Rights in Wealth The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “The similitude of two brothers (in Islam) is as two hands, one washes the other.” This means they share together difficulty and joy, wealth and circumstance. Once you have sensed that your bother is in need of something, go offer it to him at once, do not wait for him to come to you to ask for it, because if you leave him until he asks it is a shortcoming on your side in brotherhood. The Rights of Intervening for your Brother Spontaneously and in Preference to One’s own Requirements One should intervene before one is asked and to offer help with all happiness and show joy in doing so. Someone said: “If you asked your brother to do something for you, then he did not do it, remind him again, in case he has forgotten.” Ibn Chabranah did a great favor for some brethren of his, so they brought him a present, and he asked: “What is this?” They said: “This is for what you have done for us.” He said: “Take your gift, may Allah pardon you.” And if you ask your brother to do something for you and he did not bother, you should wash to pray and repeat “Allah is Great” four times, and consider him dead. Ghaffar ibn Muhammad said: “I vie in doing favors for my enemies in fear of their going away from me and seeking someone else.” If this so regarding enemies, then how much more it should be regarding friends. The early Muslims used to look after the family of their brethren for forty years after the death of a father among them, they used to attend to all the family’s needs and visit them every day to supply them from their wealth so that they did not feel in need of anything other than their father who had died. They used to receive from them things, which even their father had not bought for them in his life. The priority of your brother’s need should be the same as your own. With Regard to the Tongue, Silence and Speaking Silence is to refrain from making mention of the shortcomings of your fellow Muslim in his absence or in his presence. You should not spy or attempt to know anything of his circumstances or situation. Mention of his bad behavior or that of his family is backbiting, and this is unlawful and forbidden to every Muslim. Ibn Mubarak said: “The true believer seeks excuses while the hypocrite seeks the shortcomings.” As it is an obligation on you to restrain your tongue from making mention of his shortcomings, so it also an obligation to restrain your heart from misthinking, as misthinking is the backbiting of the heart, and that is also prohibited to every Muslim. Speaking Out Just as brotherhood requires that you should refrain from mentioning the shortcomings of your brother, it is also an obligation upon you to speak out about virtuous behavior, it is a due right in brotherhood. Whoever is content with silence then he is a companion of the inhabitants of the grave. As silence is to refrain from harm so to speak out about virtuous behavior is an obligation. One should show with one’s tongue the extent of your happiness in sharing the happiness of his brother, the true meaning of brotherhood is to share mutual difficulty and ease. The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “If any one of you likes his brother, he should inform him.” Al Shafi’i said: “Whoever admonishes his brother in private he has advised and honored him, but if he admonishes him openly he has disgraced him.” The Pardoning of Minor Faults and Mistakes The minor faults of friends are either in his religion by committing a sin, or in your due rights upon him in his neglect towards your friendship. As to what he commits of sin against this religion and his persistence in it, it is your duty to admonish him gently regarding his faults and to try to bring him to control himself to return to righteousness and piety. If he still persists and you cannot effect any change upon him, the opinion of the Companions of the Prophet varied regarding whether to either continue in his affection or to boycott him completely. Abu Dharr - may Allah be pleased with him - favored boycott and said: “If your brother has turned around from his way, hate him as you loved him.” And he saw that according to the principle that ‘Love should be in Allah and hate should be in Allah.’ But about Darda’ and his group of the Companions favored the opposite, and Abu Darda’ said: “If your brother has changed from his way, do not leave him to that. Definitely your brother will sometimes be straight and sometimes be deviant.” As to his mistakes towards his friend, it has been agreed that to pardon and tolerate is the best course of action. As much as your brother has apologized to you, whether he was sincere or not, you must accept his apology. Chapter Three Regarding the Rights of the Muslim, the Womb and Neighbor Know that the human must be either alone or with another, if he finds it difficult to live except by mixing with someone of his race, he cannot do that except by learning the ethics of mixing. The relationship is either the close relatives, which is the most important tie, or the brotherhood of Islam, which is a general tie, which under the headings of brotherhood, friendship, companionship, neighborliness, traveling companions, workmates and schoolmates. To each of these relationships are degrees. The close relatives have due rights, but the womb relationship is a sacred one, and to the sacred is a right, but the rights of the parents are definite and greater. Thus is the neighbors right, but it varies according to his proximity to your house. Acquaintances have degrees of right, the one who you have seen and know, his right is not as the one who you know of by hearsay. And after acquaintance has taken place, it becomes stronger upon familiarity. Thus is the companionship, which varies in its degrees, the right of the companion at school or in the workplace is stronger than the right of the traveling companion. Also friendship varies in degrees of right, if it is very strong it becomes brotherhood, and if it increases more it becomes an affection, and if it increases yet more it becomes a bosom friendship, and the bosom friend is closer than the beloved one. The Rights of the Muslim There rights of the Muslim are: If you meet him, you must salute with a greeting of peace, to answer him if he invites you, to invoke blessings upon him if he sneezes, to visit him if he is sick, to attend his funeral when he dies, to comply with his oath if he swears upon a thing, to offer your advice if he seeks it, to preserve him in his absence, and to love for him what you love for yourself, and to hate for him what you hate for yourself. The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “If you are seated with others then you wish to leave, you must give greetings of peace, but if you see that it is necessary for you to stay, then if you wish to leave again, you must give greetings of peace again, as the first is not more worthy than the last.” And he also said: “If you see me coming, do not stand for me, this is only the way of the unbelievers.” Jabir and Abu Talha said: “We heard the Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, say: ‘Any Muslim who assists another Muslim when his honor has been violated, and his integrity has been breached, most surely Allah will assist him to a position to, which he likes to be assisted. And any person who abandons a Muslim when his integrity has been breached, most surely Allah will abandon him in a position where he will need to be assisted’. “ The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said with regard to sneezing: “One who sneezes must say: ‘All praise be to Allah for all things,’ and the one who hears him must say: ‘Allah give you mercy,’ the one who sneezes must reply, ‘May Allah guide you and give you serenity’.” A Muslim should distance himself from mixing with the rich, and he should prefer the company of the humble, he should be kind to orphans. The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Please Allah make me live humbly and make me die humbly and gather me with the humble.” The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Whoever visits a sick person is like the one who sits in a garden in spring breezes, and when eh stands up seventy thousand angels are entrusted to pray upon him until the night.” Attending funerals: The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Whoever attends a funeral, he will get one qirat of reward, and if he waits until the burial, he will get two qirats. The Rights of Neighbors Know that the neighbor has rights beyond the rights of brotherhood. The Muslim neighbor deserve what every Muslim deserves and more. The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day let him honor his neighbor.’ The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, also said: “No servant will be a believer until his neighbor is safe from his harm.” It was said to the Prophet, praise and peace be upon him,: “A woman fasts the day and prays all night, but she harms her neighbors.” He said: “She is in the Hell Fire.” The Rights of the Relatives and the Womb The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Allah, the High, the Exalted says: ‘I am the Merciful, (al rahman) and this is the womb (al rahma), I cut for her a name of Mine, so whoever joins it, I will join him, and whoever severs it, I will sever him’. “ The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Whoever wishes to have his life prolonged and his bounty extended, let him join his womb relations.” The Rights of Parents and Child It is not unheard of that of the of the rights of the womb and the relatives the most important are the rights of the womb, and of these the greatest is that of parturition. The due rights in it are double. The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Being good to parents is much better than praying and charity and fasting and pilgrimage and Umrah and jihad for the cause of Allah.” And the Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Be good to your mother and your father, and your sister and your brother, then whoever follows them in kin.” And he also said: “The greatest goodness is that a person continues the goodness his father extended to his family after his father has gone.” It is preferable to be kind and affectionate to your child: Al Aqrah ibn Habis saw the Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, kissing his grandson al Hasan, so Al Aqrah said: “I have ten children and I have never kissed any of them!” The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “The one who does not show mercy will never see any.” Abu Said al Houdari said: “A man from Yemen migrated to the Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, wishing to join Jihad, the Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Are your parents in Yemen?” The man said: “Yes.” The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, asked: “Did you obtain their permission?” He said: “No.” The Prophet, praise and peace be upon him, said: “Return to your parents and seek their permission, if they grant you their permission, then join the jihad, otherwise be good to them as much as you can. This is the best, which you will meet Allah, the Almighty with after certifying that there is none but Him.”